This week and the next is going to be one hell of a week as we start with examinations this week. Today its Monday and I wrote my favourite subject, English. Note the sarcasm.
My date with Sean was amazing really. It ended with me and him making out. That was he best part minus the chocolate that ate. But I wouldn't really call it a date. But due to circumstances being exams, it will be our last. They are only end term exams but they still count during final exams which are at the end of the year. Knowing their ten percent importance means I would want to disturb him in his studies.
My date with Sean last Tuesday was really amazing. I cant wait for the autumn holidays. We have been at school for like 2 months already and as much as I love school, I need a vacation.
It would be nice to go home. I already miss my family. My dad, mom, nephew, little sister and brother, and my big sister. Maybe not my big sister that much. We barely see eye to eye. It was to get away from her but at the same time she is still my sister. Sometimes it feels like she hates my guts but other times it feels like she is the best sister one could really ask for.
I am already planning what I will do during the one week holiday. A week its not much that's all we get. Plus all the public holidays that come with April. Sometimes I don't understand why we get holidays during March when April has so many public holidays. Or why we get holidays at the beginning of April when the public holidays are near the end. But you can never question the system.
These holidays I am planning on gong to the farm to visit my dad. He usually stays there and comes home during the weekend. It would be nice to actually be alone from all the people.
The previous week I was happy for some reason. And that reason was definitely not the visit from aunt red river. It was because of Sean. I hate to admit it but it has come to my attention that I might has a small crush on him. Which wasn't my favourite observation.
Out of all the boys in this school, I have to have a crush on him. The reasons why I can't have a crush on him are:
1. He acts like a bad boy
2. Acts like a player
3. He drinks
5. He has a bad reputation.
But above all those reasons he is:
1. He is a good listener
2. Never judges
3. Humble
4. Nice
5. Last but not least he is really good at comforting people and giving advice. He might as well be trustworthy. But I can't trust him just yet. He is a boy after all.
So I guess there is nothing wrong with having a crush on him. He isn't as bad as the messes paint him to be. Give him a chance and you will see him for who he really is. We all have skeletons in our closets and...
Okay enough of Sean and more studying. I am sure I have spent more than 10 minutes just sitting here and thinking about him. Study time which is two and half hours is meant for studying not thinking about boys and vacations. I really need to focus.
The exams are as important as my presence in this planet but that doesn't mean I shouldn't neglect them. And I should really stop calling them exams as they are tests to see if we were listening in class. But counting the amount of times I have been caught zoning out in class, I doubt I know a lot. Which leaves me with no choice but to study. I hate studying.
But he hasn't talked to me after the date. And I doubt he will. I wonder if its me. Do I not know how to kiss? He is the first person I had kissed so it would make sense. Did I touch him in a wrong way? But I don't remember touching him in a way that would send red flags. But that must be it. Guys enjoy physical touch as much as girls do. That must be is.damn why am I so stupid. After all the books I have read I am still clueless.
*Sean POV*
Loverina Wesley. That's all I have been thinking about since the whole date thing. She is way too innocent for her own good. I know that I want more than just kisses from her. I want more than that but she refuses. And I don't want to force her into anything. The only thing I can do right now is literally stay away from her. Save her the mixed signals and the heartbreak.
Plus Regina constantly telling me that she has a crush on me doesn't help. Loverina not agreeing t have sex with me telling me to take thing slow only shows that she wants more than I can give her. I really need to distance myself from her. Am not ready for a relationship at the current moment. Plus she is really young. Imagine a 13 year old and a 16 year old. That screams only trouble.
But my final decision is to distance myself from her.