---
Just when you think things have hit rock bottom… you realize the worst hasn't even begun yet.
In a realm beyond time and meaning, the team stood face-to-face with the blazing beast. Alan—freshly regenerated in a disturbingly grotesque scene—was now sprinting in every direction, completely naked, desperately searching for something to cover himself.
But the surprises didn't end there…
---
Alan:
"Okay, guys, it's official. This is the worst moment of my life. I mean, seriously, who regenerates like this?!"
---
Rodrick (trying to stop Alan from running toward the beast):
"Can we focus on not dying first?! We'll worry about your... situation later!"
---
Kira (turning to Alan in confusion):
"Why is he still running like that?! I mean, he's already dead, right?!"
---
As the team spiraled into chaos, the beast approached once more. But instead of attacking, it simply stared at Alan, its eyes wide with disbelief.
---
Miri (in a doubtful voice):
"Uh... why is it staring at him like that? Did it... recognize him?"
---
Alan (suddenly stopping and noticing the beast's gaze):
"Wait... hold on, I think it's... It's hypnotized by my... radiance."
---
Rodrick (staring blankly):
"Are you... really serious right now?"
---
Alan (looking down at his naked body and laughing sarcastically):
"Well, it's not like I have anything to lose. Let's see if my glory can save the day!"
---
At that moment, everything shifted. The green glow pulsing from Alan's forehead began to intensify, and the beast slowly started backing away, as if frightened or confused.
---
Kira:
"Guys, it's... it's backing away! It's afraid of him!"
---
Miri (stepping forward cautiously):
"No way... I think the naked glory really is intimidating it."
---
The team watched in stunned silence as the unimaginable unfolded. The beast continued to retreat until it finally came to a complete stop—sitting calmly on the ground, as though nothing had happened.
---
Rodrick (astonished):
"Did... did we just defeat it... by being ridiculous?"
---
Alan (still running naked in the opposite direction):
"YES! I DID IT! I'M A LEGEND! I AM THE NAKED CHAMPION!"
---
But before anyone could celebrate, the beast let out a deep, thunderous roar...
ROOOOOOOAR!!
Suddenly, massive tentacles burst from the earth, surrounding the entire team—attempting to seal the gaps left by the previous battle.
---
Kira (quickly):
"Great... now we have tentacles to deal with!"
---
Miri (drawing her knife):
"Forget the tentacles! We need to figure out how to escape, now!"
---
Alan (from a distance, still running):
"No worries! I got this covered! I'm a superhero! A naked one!"
---
---
Amid Alan's screaming and his astonishment at his new body, the earthen tentacles multiplied, coiling around rocks, trees, and even the team's legs.
Demus (shouting through the smoke):
"RETREAT! WE NEED TO RETREAT!"
---
Rodrick (smashing one of the tentacles with his axe):
"Finally! A plan I can agree with!"
---
Kira (cutting a path toward the exit):
"Fall back to the ridge! We'll activate the teleport crystal from there!"
---
Alan (rolling naked down the hill):
"WAIT FOR ME!! I'M A DISTRACTION, NOT A SHIELD!"
---
Miri (grabbing him and wrapping him in her cloak):
"You're a menace, that's what you are."
---
As the team began their sprint toward the ridge, the tentacles chased after them like starving serpents, bursting from the ground like living nightmares.
Demus (throwing a smoke bomb):
"This should buy us a few seconds! MOVE!"
---
They reached the top of the ridge, drenched in sweat, their eyes fixed on their one hope: the return crystal.
Kira (pulling it out quickly):
"Teleport spell, now!"
---
But just before she could activate it… a new figure appeared behind them. Not a monster, but a mysterious person cloaked in black, standing motionless.
---
???
"So… you survived. Pity."
---
Alan (hiding behind Rodrick):
"Tell him to come back after I find pants."
---
Rodrick (raising his sword):
"Who are you? Another monster?"
---
???
"No. I'm worse. I'm your examiner."
---
The teleport crystal began to glow intensely, and before the figure could get any closer, Demus shouted the incantation at the top of his lungs:
Demus:
"GET US OUT OF HERE!!"
---
In an instant, the crystal burst in a flash of blue light, and the entire team vanished…
---
…only to find themselves suddenly standing in the Grand Hall of the Academy—covered in ash, dirt, and shame. And of course… Alan was still naked.
---
Students in the academy stared in shock. One dropped their tea.
---
Professor Helgrid (screaming from across the hall):
"WHAT IN THE NAME OF MAGIC IS THIS?!"
---
Alan (throwing up his arms):
"Ta-daaaa!!"
---
---
As professors and students screamed across the Grand Hall of the Academy, Alan stood in the center of it all—completely naked—waving his arms with unwarranted pride...
A familiar voice echoed through the chaos. Calm... yet dripping with fury.
---
Eldara (from atop the stairs, her expression cold as if carved from marble):
"Alan..."
---
Alan (quickly turning toward her, trying to cover himself with his tiny hands):
"OH! HEY, ELDARA! I CAN EXPLAIN!!"
---
Eldara (descending slowly, her black cloak billowing behind her):
"No. No, you cannot explain this."
---
Alan (backing away):
"It's part of my rebirth arc, you see—"
---
Eldara (calmly opening a small box, pulling out a glowing black cloth, and tossing it to him):
"Cover yourself. Now."
---
Alan (catching it like it's a sacred relic):
"OH THANK GODS! CLOTH!! ACTUAL CLOTH!"
---
Rodrick (chuckling):
"She carries emergency dignity cloth. Smart woman."
---
Demus (scribbling in his notebook):
"Note: add spare pants to mission gear. Urgently."
---
Eldara (standing firmly before the team):
"This was supposed to be a basic assessment mission... Not a traveling circus of screaming, flames, and nudity."
---
Kira (calmly):
"We technically survived."
---
Eldara (glaring at Alan):
"And you... are on probation. Again."
---
Alan (raising his hand):
"Does it come with snacks?"
---
Eldara (closing her eyes and pressing her fingers to her temple):
"...I'm going to drink. A lot."
---
In the corner of the hall, students began to gather around the team—talking, whispering, laughing...
Then, slowly, applause began to spread.
Not because they were heroes, but because they had just delivered the most bizarre performance in the academy's history.
---
Alan (bowing triumphantly, wrapped in the cloth):
"Thank you! I'm here all week!"
---
Eldara (muttering as she walks away):
"I should've stayed in the Elven woods..."
---
And so, the first mission came to an end.
Not with a sweeping success, nor a complete failure, but with... eternal chaos.
The team had returned, but questions began to stir.
Who was the stranger who appeared at the crystal?
Why did the tentacles attack so wildly?
But the most asked question in the academy was, simply...
"Who was that naked lunatic?"
---
To be continued...