Hah... Did I really just try to kill an innocent child? Worse—my own child?"
I admit it. I never wanted to get pregnant in the first place, let alone give birth—especially not with the kind of work I do.
Sure, I could go a year or two without a job. I've made a decent fortune from it, after all.
But still... is that reason enough to kill my child?
His crying nearly got us both killed. That beast almost devoured us.
And that—right there—is another reason why ending his life would've been justified.
This world is cruel. It doesn't allow for the luxury of raising innocent children.
Speaking is forbidden at night—let alone crying and screaming.
He'll become a burden.
I nearly ended his life…
Had it not been for that smile—
That damned smile—I would have done it.
I need to control these outbursts.
Maybe this job… maybe it's been changing me, too.
How can I even pretend to be a decent person when I make a living doing what I do?
But I have to take responsibility for this child.
Not out of love—
My heart turned to stone a long time ago.
No, I'll do it out of duty.
So he'll care for me when I'm old.
That's the truth—there's no hope left in me. My mind runs on self-interest, and nothing else.
I know my youth and beauty won't last.
So I have to invest… in the future.
And this child—he doesn't seem normal.
He smiled at the one who almost killed him.
He stared death in the face with open arms.
There's madness in his eyes.
Heh. Fascinating.
He might actually be worth the investment.
Looks like this world is about to welcome another lunatic into its twisted ranks.
I'm burning with curiosity to watch you grow.
What kind of madman will you become?
I bet you'll be terrifying.
God… I've lost it, haven't I?
Instead of wishing him peace or happiness,
I'm looking forward to watching his descent into madness.
Maybe… just maybe… his birth is a mercy for me, too.
A reason to walk away from that job for a while—
Before it devours the last scraps of my humanity.
Yes.
I think… my son might be exactly what this world deserves.