Backstory ch23
As far back as July could remember was his father beating on his mother. The first memory he had wasn't a happy one or one to be proudly remembering at the time of old age. It was a memory of his drunken father taking his rage out on his mother and beating her. Ever since he was a kid and until he was a teenager this would happen. Until he saw his own mother take her life he came home one day from school. Only to see a lifeless corpse with a rope wrapped around their throat and the rope marks buried deep inside their neck. It was his mother.
His mother had taken her very own life. Afterall it's not like she ever fought back she just took the abuse and told July to look away. All throughout his childhood he would notice the other kids get picked up by their parents after school. Only for July to walk home. Walk home alone in rain in winter in snow. No matter the weather nobody came to pick him up July was truly alone. He had nobody in this world and he realized that he knew he had to leave sooner rather then later. Slowly over the years the light in his eyes would die down. It would only become dimmer and dimmer.
Until eventually he was utterly alone. His father straight up left the house after his mother committed suicide now here was a abondon 14 year old boy. That day his father never came back was the day he grew up. Strangely enough he was grateful to his father for never even putting a hand on him. Though he knew the truth his father didn't even see him worthy of hitting constantly shunning him and seeing him like a bug. Like how any normal human would look at an animal that's dead. With disgust resentment and a feeling of shame. July could tell his father felt all these things just looking at him each day.
Perhaps there was a reason he just seemed to see July as cold or maybe there wasn't. It didn't matter to July as nobody came. No relatives no child protective services almost like he was forgotten entirely. I mean he lived in a shitty apartment with no light no electricity no gas no trash can in the middle of a run down town in a run down neighborhood. There was no reason for him to be remembered so as a result he wasn't his soul entirely. This reality setting in deeply troubled him. He decided he would become something deep in his heart it was from the constant neglect and emotional abuse growing up.
He vowed to himself to get the best grades in the whole school and become a doctor. Just like that his next three years of highschool passed with every single test he got a 100. He didn't sleep most nights he couldn't most nights. He needed to study he needed to achieve even when invited to social events from peers he rejected it. He thought it was a waste of time and wouldn't be worth doing any good afterall. He stayed alone at home with himself learning ways just to survive eating only once a day no distractions just reading to gain more knowledge that's it. He learned about several different cultures, religions, the human body anatomy, everything and anything he could learn he did.
it wasn't enough he wasn't whole he didn't feel alive. He felt like the day his mother committed suicide and his father left him alone he lost his emotions completely. Once the tournament was announced though and as soon as he saw the death around him starting from the people getting impaled. He felt real he smiled for the first time in several years he felt alive. He didn't feel like he was dead. He felt like a brand new person like a toy ripped out its plastic a fresh scent of life. Though deep down he knew he shouldn't feel this way he knew it wasn't right. Before he could push the other two away in this game he became attached and tied to them.
There was only thing he could do now he had to keep going. To keep trying for them. To keep trying for himself now. He actually found a reason to live even if it was fucked up just to see how it would all end. And he did as he stood there before shinya now he knew how he wanted to end this he knew he shouldn't be the one allowed to leave.