Time passed and it now the time for our solo pictorial for the graduation has come. As I arrived, I saw my former self outside the room where the pictorial is held, standing nervously while chatting with a guy friend.
As I was in the line to get a picture, I saw my former self taking a glance many times inside the room if I'm done taking a picture or not. I can see the expression and face of my former self being super anxious on what he will do after I will go out.
And the time has come, after being taken a picture and writing my attendance, there he is, my most pathetic self , stuttering and hands shaking, trying to speak such embarrassing words just to hand out a letter to my crush, or maybe now it's me.
I was shocked to discover that I couldn't understand what my former self said. His voice was low and I can't hear it properly. F*ck . After handing out the letter, he started walking away all embarrassed while covering his face with his hands and ran down through the stairs straight to the exit gate.
Thinking about it it made me laugh, look at my guy trying his best only to get rejected after a sickening of waiting for 3 whole anxious days.
It made me wonder what if I should just accept my former self instead, but that thought really made me feel more pathetic instead.
After arriving at home while thinking about what I should. My eyesight suddenly blurred and my body suddenly lost all it's strength. It made me collapse on the ground and slowly made me sleep.
I then woke up, not in my original body, not in my crush's body, but it was the body of my friend, the one who I talked to outside the room where the pictorial is held.
But why though, why am I standing in here watching my original self passing the letter to my crush? Why at this moment? Suddenly my world turned dark and then I awoke again but in the different body this time, it was my girl classmate. Though I didn't have the chance to check who I became because here I am again, watching the event of my self with my dream girl.
Such phenomenon happened again and again, maybe I became all the bystanders at that time while everything happened repeatedly, there was even a time where I became a junior high school girl and others aswell. It seems like this won't stop until I will experience being the people who was there at such an ridiculous event.
I was really down and depressed, who is the one doing this to me and why, why are you making me watch this shi# over and over again and again.
—Though during at that time, even though I became many different person, it seems like that the overwhelming power or that liquid mana was still within me even if I became another person, is this soul bound perhaps?—
After some time, I came back to my original body, though I don't really know why but the time I noticed I'm already handing out my letter to my crush, I froze up , having so many thoughts colliding to my head that it made me unable to move.
After some gathering all of my thoughts for a few seconds, I then passed the letter to her and said
"I hope you'll accept it"
Even though now I know I'll still get rejected, I still gave her my letter.
Though this time I calmly stood up and warmly stared at her as she walked away from me.
Even right now, I'm still thinking of how I've always wanted to be with her, to be able to hold her hands, to be able to laugh together, to be able to go home together, to be able to chat with her through either online or face to face, to be able to feel the warmth of her head as she tries to lean on my shoulder.
Such days were always on my mind everything time I see her or thought about her. Oh how my days would have been happy if you would have just accepted me.
But alas, I guess where really not meant to be.
After being such deep in thought, it seems like my friend has been calling and nudging me since a while ago.
"Woaah!!! You did it bro!!, ...she... wa..the"
though I wasn't really listening because my mind right is in a mess-
But so suddenly, here it goes again, that very feeling where my world will go black and me waking up in an unexpected situatio-
"Oh"
As I saw my surroundings and , GASP! , tadaaah!! I'm in an unfamiliar place now!!
"Well sh"* where the f*"# am I now"