I am an ordinary worker who is 30 years old and not married. I have worked in a private company for 7 years but have not been promoted. I have worked as hard as I can with the various tasks given, yes that's the situation. Wake up at 6:00, clean the bed, cook rice, then take a quick shower. A small rental in the form of a flat, of course we can imagine how comfortable the conditions are, a crying baby, the sound of a falling pan, neighbors shouting like they are in a parade and even the sound of dogs barking all the time. At first I did not expect to live in the rented place where I live now, my hope was to live in a place with few residents, certainly close to the countryside. Yes, of course the distance would be far from the office. For a man who can be said to be in his 30s and doesn't really care about socializing.. said to be an introvert, not really.. said to be a semi-introvert.. yeah maybe.. I live day by day as it is, of course I'm happy.. preett.. yes very happy.. Only gadgets and laptops always accompany me at all times. I don't know what love is, yes I used to know love but it was all just fabrication. Why engineering? Just imagine, if you say close, you are very close, even chatting every day. A little story, one time when I was in high school, it was break time.. there was a woman, eh sorry, a girl and 2 other friends who were gathering at my table with 2 chairs facing each other as usual, young people joked around and told their stories. At one point, there were only the two of us at my table, and the other friends went to buy snacks. Of course, my heart was already confused and uncontrollably awkward until my heart beat out of rhythm. A girl you like is facing you, of course, you feel uneasy and restless. In my opinion, if you look at the girl's reaction, it looks the same as my condition, unfocused eyes, and restless behavior.. because the situation was no longer conducive, I tried to lighten the atmosphere with a stiff topic.. time continued to turn, until the time came for me to get straight to the point. I'm a direct person, one set one set..
I expressed my feelings bravely.. "tuk.. tuk... tuk.." my heart was beating fast without caring about the final result. By waiting for a long answer... of course the good news, "Rejected" with the reason not wanting to date yet and the word "FRIEND". If you're a friend, why are you acting like that?? and if you're a friend, why are you chatting like that?. Yes, starting from that incident I didn't want to open myself up to what "romance" was. Even if there was a girl who liked me, of course I didn't think that she liked me. If seen from other people's perspectives, it might be considered very absurd and over the top. And there are some other perspectives that say that it is common for young people who are going through puberty. Day by day I live well, which can be said to be boring. Money that is only enough to pay for rent and food must be saved. In the past, I didn't want to work in an office like my current situation. Becoming a soldier was my dream at first, entering a military academy was my hidden dream since childhood if after graduating immediately become an officer and placed in a decent duty location. However, everything was dashed by circumstances that were difficult to understand and in my heart I felt awkward. I have gone through test after test well and the preparation that I considered mature. Arriving at the final test everything seemed clear to see, yes as we know. KKN (Corruption, Collusion and Nepotism) is very thick. If you are unlucky, sayonara is the answer. At first I didn't understand and think about what KKN was, I was just an innocent teenager and felt that I was well prepared. However, circumstances were not on my side. "Hey... you, have you finished yesterday's proposal?" my boss said to me. "Yes.. sir.." I said confidently.
This afternoon, come to my room for further confirmation. "Ready.. sir" I said firmly. I returned to my desk and checked the proposal again before printing. "Coughh.. coughhh.. coughh.." a coughing sound was heard after sipping my coffee. "Brukkk.." the sound of the glass falling until it wet my work desk and pants. "Aisssshhh...damn" I suddenly felt annoyed with the situation. I rushed to clean up and went straight to the toilet. Arriving at noon, I rushed to my boss's office to deliver the promised proposal. After delivering the proposal, I went to the office canteen to sip a cup of coffee that I had not finished earlier. After a while, I returned to my office to finish the unfinished work. Time passed until it was time to go home. I went to the office on foot, and went home on foot. The distance from the office to my house is only 2 km by passing 2 red lights. The crowded conditions, and the noisy sounds of vehicles make it a culture that continues to exist. At the red light, I kept waiting seconds until the light turned green. We who were waiting finally moved. Behind me was a man and in front of me was a teenage girl wearing a hoodie and earphones in my ears. "Tin.. tin... tin..." the sound of the car horn continued to sound with the car speeding. We were suddenly surprised and looked in the direction of the horn sound. We rushed back to avoid the car. Of course as we know, the girl in front of me ignored it and continued step by step. The car started to approach, with reflex my body suddenly moved towards the girl and pushed her "Brukkkkk..." the sound of the car hitting my body and being thrown far away. The sound of screams echoed and pools of blood flowing out of the nose, mouth, head, and ears wet the asphalt road. Yes .. what a cliche similar to dramas on tv. With the remaining little consciousness, a beautiful and bitter memory emerged at the same time. And a thought arose "I'm so stupid, why did I want to help that person", "already living a hard life, trying to live carefully". "Why ..? Oh God, what kind of life is this? " ushhhhh ... ushh .. ush. " breathing began to disappear second by second.