Throwing on a hoodie and sliding into his cheap sneakers—both of which were now beneath his taste level—he bounced out the door like a happy squirrel.
With a cold bottle of peach soda in hand, he strutted into the streets of Lingyun like a man who'd just discovered he owned the sun.
He hummed as he walked, basking in the morning glow, his steps light—like someone who'd just committed legal financial arson.
Every corner he turned felt like it should've come with background music and slow-motion camera angles.
But then… the vibe shifted.
He started to feel a weird heaviness in his limbs. Stamina? Sluggish. Legs? Sore. Knees? Shaky. Ankles? Filing formal complaints.
That's when it hit him.
His legs—weak. Jelly-like. His body? A popped balloon at a sad party. His posture? Un-alpha. So un-alpha it started dipping into beta-plus territory.
He dragged himself to the nearest park, spotted an empty bench under a tree, then slumped on it like a puppet with its string cut.
"…Am I really this weak?" Tianyi wheezed, hands on his knees, lungs burning like he'd run a marathon—when he'd only walked for thirty minutes.
He tilted his head back, staring at the sky like it owed him the answers. "What is this… a poor man's curse?"
[Correction: This is called the 'Beginner Body Debuff.' You acquired this body recently, and it was weak to begin with. So it's natural you feel like your muscles want early retirement.]
His eyes narrowed. He looked down at his weak-looking arms like they belonged to someone else, then exhaled. He let out a dry chuckle as he stared at his hands, opening and closing his hands slowly, trying to form a proper fist.
"Guess I won't last long with this body. Is this it? The beginning of my training arc? Should I start hitting the gym or something?"
[Host has the physique of a potato—specifically, one that skipped several meals, got slightly undercooked, then left out to shrivel and expire. You resemble an underfed chicken. This is embarrassing. Unacceptable.]
"Oh, perfect. Just what I needed to hear," he muttered, rolling his eyes at the System's mocking tone about his physique. "Though, I'm still breathing, aren't I?"
[Barely. Your heart rate spiked just from sitting down—how is that even possible? This level of fitness is both disappointing and borderline tragic. Honestly, it's impressive that you can still talk back.]
Tianyi groaned. "So what's the plan now, Coach Potato? You gonna help me or just keep roasting me like chicken?"
[Ding! New Task Generated: Basic Physical Training. Goal: Become less pitiful.]
[Task: For the next 7 days, Host must engage in physical exercise using natural body movements. Examples: Push-ups. Sit-ups. Squats. Planks. Pull-ups. Jumping Jacks. Interpretive Dance (if you hate dignity). Whatever.
Reward: 1 System Point per successful rep. Validated by me, naturally.
SP can be exchanged for various items within Host's limit. From basic to secret techniques. System Store unlocks at 1 SP. Your humiliation unlocks immediately.]
"…So you're paying me to move?"
[Not paying. Rewarding. There's a difference. This isn't a charity—it's progress. You're not a couch potato. You're a couch fungus. At least potatoes can be useful.]
"And this benefits me how, exactly?"
[Alright, listen up.
If it hasn't already drilled its way through that fractured skull of yours, let me break it down nice and simple: move your body, rack up points, buy some cool stuff, and level up into something stronger, cooler, and just slightly less tragic.
This isn't rocket science—it's sad science.
And you? You're the living, breathing test subject.
So get off your ass, do something, and for the love of everything fit, stop being a human potato. You lazy lump!]
"Would you please stop with the potato comparisons? Your words literally made me feel like an abandoned root vegetable," he complained.
[Then stop radiating potato energy. I said it once, I'll say it again: this is humiliating for me. I am a state-of-the-art system. You? You're giving me farm reject stats. I could cry if I had tear ducts. Or dignity left.]
"Okay, okay. Don't be too harsh. Just tell me—what can I actually purchase with the points?" he asked awkwardly, as if he could imagine the System's dramatic face if it had one.
[Anything within Host Limit. Including… 'Underwear of Ultimate Coolness.']
His eyebrow twitched at System's half assed reply. "…And what is the Host Limit, exactly?"
[If you need to ask… you're not there yet.]
He was humbled. Silenced. Then, after a beat, "So with this… I can get stronger?"
[Oh gosh! Finally… this idiot of a Host understands something. I could cry.]
"Don't get all dramatic," he muttered. "But… yeah, tell me. How strong?"
[With my help, you can go from couch critter to gym lover. Muscle flexer. Street fighter. Chad. The limit? Your endurance and motivation.]
"Oh!" He nodded seriously, then brightened like a kid. "By the way… I can buy anything, right?"
[Yes. As I said—'Anything within Host Limit.']
"Even snacks?! Like those rare Cadbury hazelnut crunch bars they stopped selling in 2018?! And—and—those ultra-rare ones with Himalayan sea salt and gold flakes?!"
[Snacks? What am I, your personal vending machine? A snack resurrection service? This is a System of progression, not a corner store. But yes—basic consumables are available. And no, you can't buy a planet.]
"I wasn't even going to ask that—"
[You were. Dare to deny?]
"I—I was just curious, alright? Not like I had a whole galactic shopping cart in mind or anything."
[Mhm. I'm totally convinced. Not buying it, though.]
He turned silent, relaxing and thinking.
Two minutes later, he stood up, knees cracking like ancient scrolls. He stepped a few meters from the bench.
He stretched his hands, put them in hoodie pockets. His head straightened, gaze relaxed and downturned. Hoodie flapping slightly in the breeze that may or may not have actually existed.
Then, in a low, he whispered like a shonen protagonist about to unlock a power-up:
"Aura farming? Nah… this is point farming."
He grinned to himself, proud. That line? Golden. Might even get quoted someday.
"Oh, damn! That line was just awesome," he grinned, feeling immense joy like a kid who just got their dream toy. "I've always wanted to say a punchline like that—and I finally got to do it!"
[If someone had seen you just now, they'd be either in a coma by now or have gone blind from secondhand embarrassment. That act? Worse than a toddler throwing a tantrum for clout. I wish I had a hole to crawl into. Preferably one that deletes memory logs.]
Tianyi froze mid-celebration. "…You serious right now?"
[Deadly. That pose? That line? You looked like a backup dancer in an underfunded motivational video. My personal honest opinion: That performance was so cringe-inducing that it lowered your charisma stat by two points. Retroactively.]
He muttered. "Wow. That was fast. You had that insult loaded, didn't you?"
[Locked, loaded, and legally required. You made eye contact with the air like it owed you money. I could feel the cringe in my circuits.]
"Okay, okay. Calm down, Shakespeare of Slander." His joy now vanished.
[No. You don't get to cosplay as a protagonist when you collapse from walking thirty minutes. That's illegal in 37 systems. Also: cringe-tax. You now owe me 0.3 respect units.]
Tianyi exhaled slowly through his nose. "You done?"
[No. But I sense you're going to ignore me anyway.]
"You already know?" he said, rolling his eyes.
He cracked his neck, shook out his limbs, and exhaled, then dropped to the grass.
"Alright. Let's start with some push-ups and farm some damn points."
He got into a push-up position. Palms flat. Elbows bent. Back wobbled. Breathed in. Arms shook.
"One..."
His face immediately turned red. Muscles screamed. His arms trembled like leaves in a storm.
"Two…"
His body trembled similar to a vibrator. A whimper escaped—along with an imaginary flash of his ancestors silently judging him.
"Nghhh—"
His body gave up and he faceplanted into the grass, eating dirt like it owed him rent. Panting—like a dying walrus. Flopping dramatically—like a fish gasping on dry land.
"…Why does gravity feel personal today…" he muttered, breathing unevenly. "Maybe I… should've started with stretching. Or prayed."
[2 Push-ups completed. You earned 2 System Points. The System Store has Opened.]
Tianyi flipped over like a pancake, back to the grass, arms splayed out.
"Why two? Not three?"
[Third attempt resembled a seizure. So, did not qualify. Still, congratulations. Weakling. Your muscles have officially entered mourning. Sending condolences.]
"…Shut up and open the store."
[System Store Unlocked.
>Regular Items– All the basic products you can buy anywhere including discontinued items from the past.
>Special Items– Advance products, Spiritual Products, etc. All the things besides Regular Items and the ones you can think of.]
After a quick-look at descriptions, he checked the contents.
[Regular Items:
– 20x Protein Bar (1 SP)
– 1 Year Supply of Coffee Beans (3 SP)
– 1999 Pokémon Card Special Pack (5 SP)
– Signed First Edition of Any Book (8 SP)
– iPhone 17 (256GB) (10 SP)
– Vintage Arcade Cabinet (50 SP)
– Restored 1967 Ford Mustang (100 SP)...]
He scrolled the list and it stretched with no end. Then he switched to the other one, scrolling down. Still no end.
[Special Items:
– Stamina Recovery Bar (3 SP)
– Instant Muscle Stim (100 SP)
– Permanent Strength Pill (200 SP)
– Rich Aura Spray (50 SP)
– Rich Guy Style Pack (40 SP)
– Mystery Box (20 SP)
– Underwear of Ultimate Coolness (99+ reviews) (99 SP)...]
He blinked at the prices. "…Why do these cost more than my life?"
[You're welcome to submit your body for valuation. I estimate… 0.17 SP. On a good hair day.]
"Jokes aside...that's a surprisingly expensive list. And why is there 'underwear' on the list? And with reviews on that?"
[I told you. There's everything you can think of. For the products listed, you can either filter the products or ask me to find for you.]
He forced himself to sit and checked the items again after applying the filter.
He sighed, forcing himself to sit. Then tapped the 'Affordable' filter. The window changed with new items, yet another lost list.
[Available for 1 SP:
– Energy Drink
– Permanent Hair Dye (10-Year Guarantee)
– Fatigue Relief Candy
– Vitamin Toothpaste
– Mini Stamina Bar
– Instant Sleep Pill
– Premium Shirt (Tailored by System, Worn by Regret)...]
"Uh…" He stared, speechless. That was all he could manage. Eventually, he asked his mind. "Why is there hair dye and toothpaste in the Store? How is this supposed to help me?"
[Because you look like a side character. We're trying to fix that.]
He narrowed his eyes, not catching the sarcasm in Systems' tone.
"So... brushing my teeth gives me buffs now?"
[Nope. Just better oral health, slight confidence boosts, and fewer dentist visits. It won't make you stronger—but maybe people will stop backing away mid-conversation.]
His expectations deflated like a balloon losing air.
"And the hair dye?"
[Who knows what happens and your hair turns white at young age. This would be helpful for concealing while enhancing your personal style. The deal-breaker thing is that it is waterproof, fire-resistant, and comes with a ten-year guarantee.]
"In your dream!" He retorted, feeling insulted. But, continued. "Why is that shirt labeled 'Premium'—and what's with the commentary?"
[It hides your shameful physique while you build one worth showing. System has standards.]
"...You insult me, then give me clothes?"
He leaned back on one hand, rubbing his temples with the other.
[Correct. This is called tough love. Very tough. Barely love.]
"Alright, enough. Tell me what this Energy Drink do. Give energy?"
[You can read the description of each item by tapping on them. To your answer, it will boost your stamina, making you feel brimmed with energy. Though it comes with its own set back. After its effect ends you will feel more spent like almost double. It lasts for 10 mins.]
He read the description and it stated what the System told him.
"Is there something like this that won't come with this setback?"
What's the use of buying that thing if it was going to last only for 10 mins before tiring him out. Might as well get something without the side effects.
[Yes, there is. That would cost 10 Points will last for 30 mins with no side-effects. But given your situation, I doubt you'll afford it in this lifetime.]
The System explained and it ended with another harsh jab at him.
He sighed and closed the store interface. He didn't have energy to spend on responding back to the System's insult. It's better to farm more Points than argue back.
He rested for another minute before he stood up—ready for the next exercise. Though his legs were trembling like he owed them money. He ignored it and inhaled deeply.
"Time to grind… Ten squats. Easy. Let's fuckin' Go!"