Not liking the aspect of affairs, I left, it was the first time such
propositions had been made to me. I felt inclined never to go near the
house again, but had promised Louise to be with her soon, and always
kept my word, so thought over the matter.
Keeping her was out of the question, I had heard that men who kept
women, did so for other men; besides I had no idea of tieing myself up
that way. I was not pleased with her: a fine girl, a fine fuck, a fresh
woman who shivered with delight the instant the prick entered her, who
was randy-arsed enough to learn anything in the way of copulation; she
had been delightful to me eight days, and might for more; but she was
coarse, vulgar, and had not two ideas in her head, was evidently violent
tempered, and excessively vain. Set her up in business! why she had cost
me hundreds to get her, why should I?
I could not make up my mind, and resolved never to go near her again;
but two days afterwards, that funny sense of fullness came over my
cock-knob, then the tingling, then the desire for cunt, then for
Louise's cunt, the ragged slit made by my cock was before my eyes, and
instead of quenching my wants in the channel of some other woman, I went
there. Camille was just outside the door, and we conversed together in
G.. d.n Sq....
She suggested my seeing Louise alone, and paying her (Camille) as I had
done before. I did not mean to submit to that restraint, nor to keep
her, but let her go her own way. "What does it matter, she must know you
will find it all out, so why not at once?" I said.
"If she knows that I know it, I must turn her out" ("I don't think
you would turn your sister out," I thought), "then I must put her into
lodgings, and she will be gay." "I can't help that." We came to no
conclusion, I left her, went to the door, rang, and Louise opened it.
She kissed and hugged me in the passage, a minute afterwards she was
on my knee grasping my prick, my fingers were on her cunt, our lips
together; in another with tongues lapping together I was up her; in two
or three minutes more we were quiet.
(I should so like to experience the feeling a woman has as she sits and
talks with her cunt full of sperm, does it feel so very pleasant sitting
so?) She poured out her griefs, Camille had asked questions, who had
been there? how did she get the bonnet, the new boots? she had refused
to tell anything, Camille had said she had better go. "Why not tell
Camille?" I said, "if she did not like it she might lump it, as far as I
was concerned;" but the girl was evidently afraid,--or was it sham?
Next day I wrote to Louise who met me, and I took her to a house into
which I had never been before. For three weeks I met her on writing
to her, and we spent hours together. She now had frequent rows with
Camille, each time she came to meet me she put on more of her new
things; at first she only came with a dress, then with the bonnet and
something else, and at last with all the finery; she looked a handsome
swell, but a vulgar one. I ceased paying Camille.
One night she said Madame had had no one visit her for a long time, nor
was she much out but often was all night, where she went she did not
know; there was one man who came, a gentleman, she thought he was a
lover of Camille's.
We came out of the house in -------- street one night after a surfeit of
voluptuous pleasures, when a woman stepped across the road, and lifted
up her veil. "Oh! my God, it's Madame," said Louise, and she got right
at the back of me where I stood. "So," said Camille, "I have found you
out, you have been in a baudy house with my old friend." She burst into
a laugh, turned, and went away without saying another word.
I don't know what actuated me in my course of conduct, at that time I
knew well what I did, but my reasons are not so clear, I cared nothing
whether Louise knew that her mistress or sister knew I had had her, yet
I did not go to the house, firstly because Camille wished me not, unless
she was out, and it did not suit me to be waiting for a girl who was
burning to let me have her, and also because Louise was in a funk when
I was with her in the house, and Camille was out. I was convinced they
were sisters, and had a glimmering, that Camille would not like Louise
to know she had been got for me by her; yet I thought that it must be
found out.
As Camille walked away Louise began to cry, I could not get a word from
her; we walked up and down A... street, she was frightened to go home,
we went back to the baudy house, and there we slept. The next day we
stopped there, and I went home with her,--Camille was within.