**[System Interface - Active]**
Ethan Kane mentally scowled at the floating blue text in his vision:
**[Host: Ethan Kane]**
**[Race: Human]**
**[Skill: Conqueror's Haki]**
**[Points: 0]**
*"This system's dumber than a bag of rocks,"* he grumbled internally. Back in Texas, AI assistants could schedule your colonoscopy while ordering pizza. This thing? Barely functional.
A sudden ping:
**[Ding!]**
**[User complaint registered]**
**[Response: Skill issue]**
Ethan nearly choked. *"Did it just sass me?!"*
---
**Toyota Crown - En Route to Sobu High**
The car's leather seats creaked as Ethan turned to Kirisu. "Sensei, my history grades sucked. Mind giving me the cliff notes on Japan?"
Kirisu adjusted her glasses, the sunlight glinting off the frames. "A curious request from someone who aced Stanford's entrance exams."
*"Shit. Forgot my cover story."* Ethan shrugged. "Standardized tests are rigged. I'm more of a... hands-on learner."
The teacher sighed but obliged:
"Post-WWII, Japan rebuilt under U.S. occupation until 1952. The Security Treaty keeps American bases here as a strategic—"
"Whoa, whoa." Ethan held up his hands. "I meant like... cultural history. Samurai. Shoguns. That jazz."
Kirisu's eye twitched. "This 'jazz' includes the Meiji Restoration abolishing samurai in 1873."
Ethan nodded along until—
"Of course," Kirisu added coolly, "the U.S. *encouraged* dissolving zaibatsu conglomerates after the war."
Ethan's coffee almost went airborne. *"Hold up. Alternate history?"*
**[Ding!]**
**[Worldline Divergence Detected]**
**[Post-WWII U.S.-Japan Relations: 87% Match to Host's Timeline]**
Ethan exhaled. *"Okay, mostly normal. But why's she emphasizing—"*
The car lurched to a halt.
"Sobu High," Kirisu announced. "Try not to embarrass yourself."
---
**Principal's Office - 10:17 AM**
Three administrators practically tripped over themselves bowing:
"Mr. Kane! What an honor!"
"$15,000 monthly scholarship!"
"Perhaps a personal tour guide? Our cheer squad volunteers—"
Ethan crossed his arms. "I'll take the cash. Skip the escort service."
The principal mopped his brow. "Of course! Though... your father's donation to our STEM lab was most generous."
*"Dad donated? What the hell?"* Ethan kept his smile frozen.
**[Ding!]**
**[Backstory Updated]**
**[Senator Richard Kane: $2M 'Educational Grant' to Sobu High]**
*"Christ. He bought my way in."*
Kirisu's nails dug into her clipboard. "This concludes the orientation."
---
**Hallway - 10:34 AM**
Ethan matched Kirisu's furious stride. "Sensei, you're grinding your molars."
"Academic integrity is paramount," she hissed. "Yet here you are—"
"Whoa." Ethan blocked her path. "I didn't ask for Daddy's bribe."
Kirisu's glare could've flash-frozen sushi. "Your entire presence reeks of privilege. First the airport, now this?"
Ethan's Conqueror's Haki flickered—just enough to make a nearby potted plant tremble. "Want to test that theory?"
A beat. Two.
Kirisu exhaled through her nose. "Class 2-F awaits."
---
**Classroom 2-F - 10:45 AM**
Pre-class chatter died as Kirisu entered.
"New homeroom teacher?" whispered a pink-haired girl (Yui Yuigahama).
"Scary..." shuddered a petite eyepatch-wearer (Shizuka Hiratsuka's niece?).
Kirisu's chalk snapped against the board. "This is Ethan Kane. Try not to infect him with your idiocy."
Ethan smirked at the sea of uniforms. "Howdy. Texas born and raised."
A blond athlete (Hayama Hayato) perked up. "American? Cool! Do you ride bulls?"
"Only on weekends," Ethan deadpanned.
A deadpan voice (Hachiman Hikigaya) muttered: "Yankee imperialism dressed in cowboy boots."
Ethan zeroed in on the cynic. "Care to repeat that, partner?"
The room held its breath.
**[Ding!]**
**[Character Analyzed: Hachiman Hikigaya]**
**[Trait: 'Loner's Insight' - Detects Falsehoods]**
*"Great. A human lie detector."*
Hachiman met his gaze. "You're not here to study. There's another reason."
Before Ethan could retort—
"Enough." Kirisu's pointer stick cracked like a gunshot. "Kane, sit behind Yukinoshita. Try not to corrupt her."
A blue-haired girl (Yukino Yukinoshita) didn't look up from her book. "Impossible. I'm vaccinated against fools."
Ethan dropped into his seat. *"Well, this'll be fun."*
**[To Be Continued...]**