"Ha… haha, I-I was just joking," Hu Tao awkwardly scratched her head, letting out a couple of dry laughs in an attempt to ease the tension.
"Then tell me, beautiful, smart, and incredibly capable Master Hu—does that 'buy one tombstone, get one free' deal still apply?"
Shajin's lips curled into a playful smile as he asked with a glint in his eye.
"Eh? Well… it does still exist…" Hu Tao blinked in surprise, then caught on. A flicker of joy lit up her gaze, but she quickly returned to her usual nonchalance, waving her hand as if nothing had happened. "This promotion's been running for quite a while now~"
"Then I'll take one tombstone, please~" Shajin replied casually, like he was ordering lunch at a street stall.
"I knew it—sorry for bothering you… wait, what did you just say?!"
Hu Tao had expected him to turn her down like all the others—make an excuse and disappear. But instead, he agreed without hesitation.
Shajin shrugged, still smiling. "I said, I'll take one, thank you."
"I didn't mishear that, right?" Hu Tao's eyes widened in disbelief. She stared at Shajin like she was seeing a ghost.
She circled around him—front and back, left and right, even glanced at him from head to toe—trying to spot something wrong.
But no matter how she looked at it, the man in front of her didn't seem like someone close to death.
"You don't look like someone about to kick the bucket," Hu Tao finally said, suspicious.
Shajin shrugged again, unconcerned. "There's an old saying in Liyue: whether you die early or late, you still die. Better to be prepared. Who knows when my time will come?"
Hearing that, Hu Tao's face lit up with delight. She clapped her hands together, beaming. "Now you are speaking my language!"
She tidied her hat and straightened her robe with a ceremonious air.
"Allow me to reintroduce myself! I'm Hu Tao, the 77th Director of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor!"
Shajin took off his hat and placed it solemnly over his chest in return.
"Shajin, at your service, Director Hu."
"Mhm~ Not bad, not bad at all. When I was three, I stood on my head and recited scriptures. I read through the Compendium of the Departed. At six, I skipped school and snuck into a coffin for a nap. At eight, I moved into the parlor full-time to study funeral rites… Trust me, you're in good hands."
She slipped behind him and started pushing him forward. "No time like the present! Let's go to the parlor!"
"Hey hey hey, Director Hu, stop pushing—I can walk on my own!"
…
Hu Tao led Shajin enthusiastically to the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor, chatting away about all the current promotions.
Shajin listened with mild amusement, silently admiring her dedication to the job.
Once they arrived, Hu Tao pulled out a contract and handed it over.
"Here you go, take a look! If everything looks good, just sign at the bottom."
Shajin skimmed through it—pretty straightforward, all things considered.
Just as he was about to sign, Hu Tao leaned in with a conspiratorial smile.
"Let me tell you a secret—Wangsheng Funeral Parlor has an extra special bonus gift!"
"Oh?" Shajin raised an eyebrow. "What kind of bonus?"
"If you purchase a tombstone, you'll receive a handcrafted Cor Lapis Coffin collectible, carved personally by our esteemed Consultant Zhongli!" Hu Tao said with a wink.
Shajin's mouth twitched. A coffin… as a collectible? Seriously?
City folk really knew how to live it up—or die in style.
Still, he picked up the pen, signed the contract, and handed over 100,000 Mora on the spot.
"Alright, pleasure doing business! I promise I'll send you off in the grandest way possible!" Hu Tao grinned from ear to ear.
"Looking forward to it," Shajin replied, turning the Cor Lapis coffin over in his hands.
Despite its shape, it was a beautifully made piece. The stone was premium grade, the lines were elegant, and the craftsmanship was exquisite—every detail carved to perfection. It wasn't just a coffin. It was a work of art.
"Director Hu, where might I find this Consultant Zhongli?"
"Zhongli?" Hu Tao tilted her head. "He's probably watching Yun Jin perform right about now."
"An opera performance, huh? Not a bad way to spend the day. I'll be taking my leave."
"Take care, Shajin~"
…
The seats in front of the stage were already filling up fast.
Fortunately, Shajin had arrived early. Any later, and he might've had to stand.
"Excuse me, young man—is the seat beside you taken?" a deep, composed voice asked.
Shajin looked up.
The man standing before him had long, ink-black hair flowing smoothly to his waist. He gave off a calm, reserved aura—like still waters that ran deep.
His tall frame stood like an ancient pine, unwavering through centuries of wind and rain.
He wore a dark brown robe embroidered with intricate golden patterns, each thread telling a tale of time, like ancient carvings etched by the years.
Though he appeared to be in his late twenties at most, his bearing held the weight of ages.
"Please, be my guest," Shajin replied politely.
"Much obliged." The man sat down and introduced himself.
"I am Zhongli. May I have your name, friend?"
Zhongli?
Shajin's brows lifted slightly.
"Would you happen to be the Consultant Zhongli of Wangsheng Funeral Parlor?"
"I am."
"A pleasure to meet you. I'm Shajin. Just earlier today, I received a Cor Lapis coffin crafted by you, courtesy of Director Hu."
"Ah… a Cor Lapis coffin," Zhongli echoed thoughtfully.
"If I'm not mistaken, that's one of the items we offer as a complementary gift for those who purchase our full service package."
There was something more behind his words, but Shajin didn't pry. He waved it off casually.
"In the end, we all die. Preparing ahead of time isn't such a bad thing."
"Indeed," Zhongli nodded.
Just then, the curtains on stage slowly parted, revealing a young girl around Hu Tao's age.
She stood center stage, her voice rising with haunting beauty and emotion.
"Alas~"
"The lone swan of autumn flies no more~"
"A fool's longing turns to madness~"
…
"Dust to dust in the tangled red threads of fate~"
"Gone, like smoke~"
Thunderous applause erupted from the crowd. Praise echoed through the plaza.
"She's incredible!"
"No wonder she's Master Yun!"
Shajin joined in the applause, then leaned toward Zhongli.
"What do you think of the play, Mr. Zhongli?"
"Master Yun's foundations are solid. Her performance tonight is consistent with her usual brilliance—poised, emotional, and resonant," Zhongli said calmly.
"No, no, Mr. Zhongli," Shajin said, his voice deepening. His sunglasses reflected the light, making it hard to read his expression. "I meant the story."
"Was that girl really willing?"
He continued, voice lowered.
"These days, Liyue is growing more divided. Many remote villages can barely get by on hunting alone, while the Fatui and Treasure Hoarders run rampant across the borders."
"From what I've heard, the Liyue Qixing controls over sixty percent of the economy."
"I wouldn't be surprised," Shajin said softly, "if that girl was pushed step by step toward tragedy by the ignorant villagers who raised her."
Zhongli took a slow sip of tea, then replied in a measured tone.
"Your perspective is noted, young man. But I do not share the same view."
_
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