The Phoenix
During the Christmas break, I had time to reflect upon myself. My experience finally opening up with Lilly may have been heartbreaking and bittersweet, but it taught me a valuable lesson about when it's ok to be vulnerable and when to withdraw.
Because of my Mexican Catholic household, there was plenty of things that helped clear my mind- especially doing the Matachine dances. These dances were very physically and spiritually enduring. On one of these events, we literally danced for 24 hours, it started on the morning of December 23rd and ended on the Morning of December 24th to welcome the Christmas Eve mass.
When I wasn't doing that, I was drawing a lot. I switched between the anime style pin-ups and drawing fantasy creatures. One creature that had really started to resonate with me had become the Phoenix.
During one of our family outings, we went to a local dairy that also had a private zoo with plenty of animals you can interact with. The ones that really caught my eyes were the peacocks, especially the one white peacock that they had.
Its snowy appearance wasn't as colorful as the others. but, when the sun of the golden hour shines across it's iridescent plumage, it became very mesmerizing like seeing where the inspiration for the flames of the Phoenix may have come from.
~The Phoenix burns at its end, and from the ashes rises once again.~
It got to the point that I became obsessed and created a small fractured phoenix design that I started to draw on everything. My notebooks, backpack, even drew it on the back of my left hand whenever I was bored. It became my brand. My personal glyph.
On New years eve, I was with my father anticipating any possible outcome. Was this Y2K thing really going to happen and create this havoc many people were convinced would happen? Was this just going to be the start of a new cycle?
Whatever it may be, I was ready to burn the old to be reborn just like the Phoenix. I had my eyes shut tight during the countdown, every number marking the final moments of the millennium.
3...
2...
1...
"HAPPY NEW YEARS!!
I waited a bit longer to open my eyes to witness some worldwide blackout or other impending doomsday scenario, but that never happened.
My father and his side of the family were cheering, giving each other hugs and kisses, and of course what would new years be without the champagne.
(I helped myself to a cup or few. Shhh. This stays between us)
The only thing left from here is to review my new class schedule.
I was even more excited about this semester. Because the swimming season was only available during the fall semester, I finally get to sleep in a bit longer and even get to hang out on Misfit Island during breakfast.
That also meant all those in the swim team got moved to different P.E classes in the morning. I got Tennis. I've Never played, so this should be interesting.
Following that:
math(bleh),
Chemistry (could be fun)
Lunch hour (only the best hour)
French (I was feeling exotic)
Sociology
Art
English 2b.
There's also the dreaded night school which starts sometime in February. I was not looking forward to that. It has that same hellish feeling of summer school, only at night.
---
On the first day of the Y2K semester, it felt foreign seeing campus so lively in the morning, I was almost overwhelmed. All last semester, I had become accustomed to seeing it so vacant before the sun broke light or when class was already in session.
On my way to Misfit Island, I spotted Lilly and her crowd at the side of the main entrance. She smirked and flipped me off and I did just the same. That was already making it feel like it was going to be a great day.
It was a little colder that January morning and noticed something different when I made it to that area in the courtyard that we called Misfit Island.
"Where the hell is everyone?"
The Island of Misfits was completely empty. I looked around to see anyone familiar, but there was nobody.
The library was nearby so I decided to check in there as it was very cold. Upon opening the doors, I did hear many familiar voices. The Island has moved indoors during the cold mornings.
I was smiling, finally feeling like things might turn around this year.
But then, I saw her.
Why was CC crying at the stairwell?