Chapter 49: "Still Breathing"
The quiet hum of the machines never stopped. It filled the silence like a ticking clock, a reminder that time hadn't frozen even though Zariah felt like she had.
She stared at the ceiling, unmoving. Not because she was too weak—though she was—but because there was nothing to move for.
Jasmine hadn't left her side since the night she saved her. She sat curled in the corner chair now, asleep in the most uncomfortable position imaginable, arms folded across her chest, head leaning against the wall. Her face was tired, even in sleep.
Zariah blinked slowly. Everything hurt—her arms, her head, her chest—but mostly her heart. She hadn't spoken again since the night before. What was there to say?
She was still here.
She didn't want to be.
That was the truth.
When the nurse came in later that morning with a tray of food, Zariah turned her face away. The scent of eggs and toast made her stomach twist. She hadn't eaten in days. Maybe longer. She wasn't counting.
"Sweetheart, you have to try," the nurse said softly.
Zariah didn't answer. She didn't even look. She just stared out the window, her expression unreadable.
Eventually, the nurse sighed and set the tray down. "I'll come back later."
The door closed behind her. Jasmine stirred, rubbing her eyes and stretching with a groan. "Morning..." she said through a yawn.
Zariah said nothing.
Jasmine's gaze moved quickly to Zariah's arm—wrapped in clean, white bandages—and then to her face.
Still nothing.
"You didn't eat."
Zariah gave the smallest shake of her head.
Jasmine sat forward, resting her arms on the edge of the bed. "Z... say something. Please. Anything."
Zariah's eyes finally met hers. They were hollow. "Why did you stop me?"
Jasmine froze. "Because I love you."
Zariah didn't respond. She looked back at the ceiling, jaw tight.
"You don't believe me," Jasmine whispered.
Zariah's voice was so low it was barely audible. "I don't believe anything anymore."
It wasn't a dramatic statement. It wasn't meant to make Jasmine cry—but she did.
"Zariah, I don't know what to do if you won't let me in. I'm scared, okay? I'm so scared."
Zariah closed her eyes. "You should be."
Jasmine stood abruptly and walked to the window, blinking away tears. "I don't care how scary this gets. I'm staying. You can hate me. You can scream at me. But I'm staying."
Zariah didn't argue. She didn't even move. A part of her wanted to scream—wanted to rage and throw things and make someone understand what it felt like to be alive when you didn't want to be. But the fire had gone out. All that was left was smoke.
She was still breathing.
That's all she had.