Drew pulled Martin aside.
Martin gave him a puzzled look. "What is it? Why all the secrecy?"
Drew said, "Have you heard about that whole Jeffrey Epstein situation?"
Martin shrugged nonchalantly. "Already saw it coming. That guy had no sense of restraint. But what's it got to do with me?"
"Your trusty sidekick Ivanka's father—Donald Trump—was mentioned in his testimony."
"…Does Ivanka know?"
"A contact of mine in the judicial system leaked the info. I haven't told her yet."
"Let's keep it under wraps for now. I'll figure out a way to get Donald off the hook."
(Author's note: The Epstein case was already mentioned in a previous chapter, so we won't go into detail here.)
Martin wasn't one to cover for criminals, but in this case, Trump was genuinely innocent—just caught in the crossfire of the Epstein scandal.
In the original timeline of "7/17," Trump, along with several other celebrities, got dragged into the mess, but it turned out Epstein was just muddying the waters with petty tricks.
Later, during police investigations and court testimonies, all the girls from "Loli Island" confirmed:"We never saw Trump there—not once! Just some dress shirts and zippers getting stuck!"
At the time, Trump was no longer president. Accusations of "colluding with Russia," abusing power, cheating on his SATs, and tax evasion had already stripped him of political influence. So, those testimonies were fairly trustworthy.
The funniest part? When the "Loli Island" scandal broke, Trump, instead of lying low, dragged Clinton into it with a smug smirk.
To the press, he said:"Clinton flew to Loli Island 27 times—everyone knows what went down there."
And after Epstein mysteriously died in jail, Trump doubled down:"Clinton's the real mastermind behind Loli Island. Epstein? Just a fall guy."
That was during Trump's "whistleblowing" phase—he figured, if he was going down, everyone else might as well go with him.
The most bizarre curiosity of the whole "Loli Island" saga? It wasn't the ex-president Clinton, the hoodie-clad tech moguls, Prince Andrew of England, Chancellor Ballack, screen king Kevin Spacey, black pop emperor Michael Jackson, or magician David Copperfield that caught everyone's attention…
It was the world-famous physicist Stephen Hawking. [HAHAHAHAHAHAHA]
This guy—paralyzed from the neck down, only able to move two fingers and his vocal cords—why was he on Loli Island?
Some said:"Maybe he was the one getting fucked." [HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!]
Others joked:"He can't move, but other people can!"
Even more imaginative ones added:"He's still got two working fingers. That kind of research spirit—voluntarily going to an island to study black holes—is truly inspirational." [HAHAHAHA]
According to his second wife, despite being paralyzed for over 50 years, Hawking had an exceptionally high libido.Every day, he demanded a "release," and when the mood struck, would even request more extreme acts.
Eventually, his wife couldn't take it anymore. One day while bathing him, she sprayed him with scalding hot water, burning him and prompting howls from the bathroom.
Hawking sued her for abuse; she countersued for defamation. After their divorce, Hawking reportedly became a regular guest on Loli Island.
What's real, what's not? No one really knows. The truth likely went with him to the grave. Let's just treat it all as a dark comedy.
…
As the Epstein case unfolded, dragging in more and more elites, the American public—and even the global public—ate up the drama like candy, forgetting day from night.
Martin flew to New York to meet with Donald.
The old white man didn't exactly welcome his daughter's boyfriend with a warm smile.
"What?! Epstein said I was involved too? Bullshit! Sure, we were acquaintances. Played around a little. But I never went to that damn island. It's not even my type! I like big curves—none of that kiddie crap!"
Trump stomped in rage.
"So you never went to Loli Island. But you did party with him?"
Martin asked, curious.
"Of course! Wait a second—why the hell am I telling you this?"
Trump pointed at Martin with a stern expression."Just because you're sleeping with my daughter doesn't mean you get to boss me around."
Martin chuckled and deliberately coughed."I had a few properties and empty lots in LA I was planning to hand over to your real estate company."
Trump's expression instantly changed."Someone get this guest our finest coffee!"
Then he warmly grabbed Martin's hand."Martin, let's talk about those lots you mentioned…"
"Sure thing!"
After a round of polite socializing, Martin reminded Trump to keep his mouth shut—he'd take care of the "Epstein mess."
But then—
Could Trump not run his mouth?
On Martin's fourth day back in LA, Trump was back in front of the press, yapping again."Epstein's trying to drag me through the mud. I never went to that damn island. But Clinton did—27 times!"
Martin stared at the newspaper headline showing Trump mid-rant, hair flying, passionately waving his arms. He couldn't help but go silent.This guy's seriously just… unbelievable.
Oh well. In the original timeline, this clown still came out unscathed. Let him bark if he wants.
Shortly after, Ivanka finally called.
Martin reassured her."Don't worry. I already pulled strings. Donald's in the clear."
…
By mid-July, after two months of intense filming, District 9 was finally ready to wrap.
On set, a section of street had been built. A dozen extras played passersby while a few cars moved through the shot.
Suddenly, a door burst open by the roadside. A ragged, panicked Robert Downey Jr.—the Wikus character—stumbled out, clearly shaken.
Clutching something protectively to his chest with his left hand, he hurriedly scanned his surroundings.
Martin signaled silently.
Camera operator Castro raised the long-lens camera. The boom mic operator and the whole crew followed in lockstep.
Wikus sprinted down the street, crashing into two extras.
One of them shouted, "Hey! Watch it!"
Wikus turned back with a glare. "Shut up!"
Then he yelled to the gathering crowd, "Scram! Nothing to see here!"
He bent low and bolted off again.
Only when he'd vanished around the corner did Martin raise the mic and call, "CUT! I declare that District 9 has officially wrapped! Everyone, head over to Blue Moon Bar—It's on me!"
"Aaaah!"
"Wooo!"
The crew broke into cheers and laughter.
Robert jogged back, a bit breathless, and said, "Man, you're fast at calling wrap!"