Chapter 51
As Hiruzen was finishing the last preparations for the Chunin Exams and approving the list of guests coming to the village, he heard a sound in his head. At first, he felt a bit nervous about reading the words that appeared before his eyes. But the hesitation lasted only for a second; he had no time to hesitate. If it was a message of failure, he needed to know and move on.
"Ding! Kusagakure was saved from destruction. Ding!"
"Ding! Congratulations. For your actions in saving Kusagakure, you are rewarded with a random memory of the original host of the body. Ding!"
"Ding! Congratulations. You have received memories of Speed. Ding!"
"What the…"
It was already annoying that the system rang bells in his head for every sentence, rather than consolidating it into one message. But when he read what kind of memories he was receiving, he was partly angry but mostly confused. He wished he could receive memories of combat or something similar. But he wasn't disappointed for long.
"Fuck."
All this time, Hiruzen thought he was progressing well. But this reward only told him how pathetically weak he was and would be in the future, no matter how much he tried. Even if he worked for the next ten years, he wouldn't have been able to conceive even half of what he knew about himself now.
It wasn't a normal memory; he was sure of it. It was as if his muscle memory had just awakened. It felt like his body was waking up after years of slumber. Of course, he first cursed himself for not possessing the ability to utilize speed before, but now it opened the floodgates to countless possibilities for the future.
It meant that his status meant nothing. Strength, intelligence, taijutsu, ninjutsu, or anything else was meaningless if he didn't know how to use it. The numbers meant nothing. At least not until he receives the memories of it all. He didn't like the implications of it all, even if he was quite happy to get this power up.
Moving his hand, he marveled at how quickly he could weave hand signs. No matter how well he memorized the jutsu and how perfect his chakra control was, it still took time to weave hand signs to use a jutsu. But now, he could weave dozens of hand signs in a second. And it wasn't even the beginning.
It wasn't just his body that was faster, but his mind, too. He could suddenly read everything faster than he ever imagined possible, and everything around him felt like it had become slower. No, it was just that his eyes could now perceive everything at an accelerated rate. It was incredible as he realized how much potential this body has.
But it made him furious, as he recognized how inadequate he was and again questioned why the hell he was stuck in this body in the first place when he couldn't even use a tenth of its full potential. Once more, Hiruzen started to question his existence, what this system was, and what it wanted from him.
Was it some god that enjoyed laughing at him? Otherwise, why the hell hadn't it given him those memories to begin with? Once again, it made more sense to think of the system as a puppeteer and himself as a puppet. Those rewards were nothing but strings that made him move the way the puppeteer desired.
"Damn it, I am out." Hiruzen was experiencing an existential crisis and was starting to get into a panic attack as he furiously searched for his tobacco. "Shizune!"
Why was he doing this to himself? He just had to start considering the meaning of it all. He couldn't be happy about receiving a meaningful reward that would save him from most life-threatening situations. Why couldn't he just stop thinking and asking questions that he already knew would lead him nowhere? Because he was a fucking idiot, that why.
"Bottom shelf," Shizune entered the Hokage's office and quickly realized what was happening as Hiruzen was frantically destroying his table, looking for something.
"Phew." Hiruzen found a small bag and quickly put its contents in his pipe before lighting it and taking a long puff. "You are a lifesaver. Please remind me to give Yamanaka my thanks for this new stuff. It is certainly something else."
"I'm sure he will be happy to hear it."
"Anyway, I will need you to order more of the stuff," Hiruzen said as he relaxed into his chair. "There, I have completed the list of approved guests. Make sure that the list of foreign shinobi and nobles is distributed to everyone. I want every active shinobi to memorize it, so they don't make mistakes when they arrive, and so they can quickly recognize anyone who isn't on the list, even if that isn't too likely to happen."
With this done, Hiruzen felt like everything was now prepared for the next week's Chunin Exams. The borders were secure, and the Daimyo, along with the rest of the nobles, were assigned protection. There was literally nothing more he could do, and yet as he relaxed, he couldn't stop thinking about what else he should do.
Damn him and his work ethic. It wasn't healthy to work so much and think about work when he wasn't working. In his previous life, he wasn't like this. He was lazy and always did the bare minimum he needed. After all, it wasn't logical to do more than he was paid for. And yet in this life, it wasn't about the pay; it was all about responsibility.
It always came to the responsibility he was thrown into. Why did he accept it so readily again? Probably because he was afraid of others finding out he was a fake and trying to kill him, or worse, torturing him until they got the answers they wanted to hear and the answers he didn't have.
But those times were long gone. Hiruzen was already reaching the end of his second year in this fucked-up situation. Many things had happened. There was really no longer any reason for him to take on such responsibility anymore. He could force the position on Tsunade or Jiraiya, or Fugaku, even to Hiashi if he wished to.
So, why hadn't he?
That was quite a good question. And he had answers to it. Too many, in fact. But all it boiled down to was that he could no longer throw away his responsibility. Along the way, trying to act like the true Hiruzen Sarutobi, he started becoming him. It would be fine, but along the way, he started to forget who he was. Who he really was.
He had memories of his past life, but they became blurrier with each passing day, and even though he couldn't believe it, he was starting to let go of those memories on his free will. Letting them slip away simply because they weren't important anymore. Everything that had ever existed in this previous life was no longer significant. Only the knowledge of this world mattered, and that was all that he would soon be left with.
"Shizune, do I have any meetings left today?"
"If you wish so, you won't have any."
"I'm going for a walk," Hiruzen replied. "Reschedule any meetings I had today."
"It is already done, sir."
"You know, I should consider you as a candidate for my replacement."
"Don't even think about it," Shizune glared at Hiruzen, and it wasn't a cute glare; it was a promise of stabbing him in the back, multiple times, kind of a glare, if he considered it even for a moment longer.
"On the other hand, I should find Kakashi. I haven't talked with him about his future in quite some time."
Hiruzen quickly excused himself as he finished his smoke. He didn't want to piss off Shizune, the only good thing about his work. And he was getting a bit hungry and wanted to see Teuchi. The old cook never failed to lift Hiruzen's spirits. And maybe he could check on Ayame to see how she was doing.
On the way to his favorite food vendor, Hiruzen observed the village. It was in a good mood, festive even. Everyone was excited for the first Chunin Exams since the war. If only their expeditions didn't put even more pressure on Hiruzen. Even though the system didn't warn him of anything unexpected happening, Hiruzen would be a fool not to be prepared for anything and everything.
Failing to do so would mean letting down his village, letting down the happy people who believed that better times were finally coming into their lives. He felt satisfied when he saw that Konoha was becoming livelier. It was his doing, and his work had paid off. Their smiles and respectful looks were for him.
"Hokage-sama," Teuchi greeted Hiruzen with a smile. "What would you like?"
"Surprise me," Hiruzen replied as he took a seat in the middle of the stool. "It has been a long time since I visited here. Maybe you have something new?"
"One whole lobster ramen coming in," Teuchi replied with a smile.
It relieved Hiruzen greatly that the chef was in a good mood. That meant Ayame was doing fine. All his worries and burdens seemed to lift at that moment. Every time he came here, he feared that Teuchi wouldn't be in a good mood. The thought of that was scarier than any other fear he had.
It was simply because, if that were true, he wouldn't know what to do. As pathetic as he felt, he had learned to run the village and solve its problems. He was getting better and would fight anyone if it came to that, even if he had no hope of ever winning. But if Teuchi asked for help with his daughter, what could he do?
"There you go," Teuchi said, setting a bowl of delicious-looking ramen before him.
"That looks good." Before Hiruzen could taste it, Jiraiya arrived and sat next to him. "Give me the same and a bottle of your best liquor."
"You got rejected once again," Hiruzen observed.
"Don't worry," Jiraiya replied as he took the bottle Teuchi presented him and poured a drink for himself. "I still remember what you said the first time I got rejected by Tsunade. Rejection makes a man stronger. A man should laugh off all the bad stuff that happens to him and smile through the pain. Or something along those lines."
"That doesn't sound like me."
"You were different back then," Jiraiya replied. "But I guess people change. Or is it the world that changed?"
"Everything has changed, and it keeps changing. I would be scared if it didn't."
"I guess, but my feelings don't seem to get the memo," Jiraiya said. "Tell me, did your feelings about me change over time? Back then, I was nothing but a troublemaker who looked for shortcuts. I wasn't as smart as Orochimaru or as brilliant as Tsunade. Did you even see anything in me?"
"Do you ever think of how the village was built?" Hiruzen asked, digging into his memories of Jiraiya and answering how he truly felt. "I believe it all started with a seed of hope that never stopped growing. I think of you similarly. A seed that refused to stop growing. And now you are a mighty tree that does not fall even in the worst storms. A tree that shields others in its shadow."
"Wow, no pressure, huh?"
"None at all."
"Well, I don't feel like drinking anymore," Jiraiya said, standing up, not even finishing his drink or waiting for the ramen to be made. "I will be going. I have a book to write, while the feelings are still raw."
As Jiraiya left, Hiruzen continued to enjoy his ramen. He really wished he had another smoke, but he had just smoked the last one. His relaxed mind was starting to fade away, and he began to think about what he had to do to change the world's and the village's fates. And what was he willing to do for it?"
A.N. Sorry for the delay. For personal reasons, I amunavailable on weekends, so I will not be posting on workdays. This story will be updated every Wednesday from now on.
As always, thanks for reading and supporting me, so I can continue writing without any concerns, and if you want more, up to seven more chapters, you can support me on pa treon. com \ ironwolf852.