I reeled as I walked towards a park. I caught my breath, but it stung when air passed through my lungs. Maybe it could've gone differently. Maybe it didn't have to end with pain and bruises. Maybe the truth is always better than a well-intentioned lie. I didn't know.
I sat on a bench and under the shield of darkness, I felt refuge from my pain. Not just the physical but the weight of my so selfish heart...for a moment...I felt that all so lovely nothingness...that state of non existence that I so longed for.
"You know, young men like you should be careful at night. You never know who might be lurking." I turned and I saw this almost ethereal woman. She was wearing a burgundy halter and a silk shawl. Skin with the luminescence of moonlight and lips as red as fresh roses. Her silky jet black hair flowed with the wind and she carried herself with a certain grace.
"Ah yes, monsters and beautiful women, although I'm not certain which is more dangerous." I don't know what it was, maybe it was the cool moonlight breeze or the single streetlight barely lighting our faces, but as a writer, I could not let this moment pass without playing along.
She smiled a mysterious smile– a curvature subtle but unignorable. "Sometimes, in one person you can find both."
"I can think of worse ways to go."
"Charmed." She then offered her hand to me. Whether to kiss or to shake I couldn't do either, I could only reach out. But as I did I felt a sharp pain on my shoulder and I pulled back.
She moved closer to me and touched my shoulder. "Oh my, you're hurt." Now that she was closer, her perfume overwhelmed my senses...jasmine...
She reached for her bag and took out a silver flask. I then felt cool and slender fingers place it in my hands. "I have something to make all the pain disappear, My lone wolf." Something about the last part made the hairs on my arms stand on end.
I opened the flask and it was this red mixture. I took a sniff and smelled cherries.
"Don't be shy now, take a sip." She caressed my shoulders gently.
"I was warned not to take drinks from strangers." I held the silver flask tightly in my hand. A morbid curiosity came over me. There was no way this could end well for me. I was looking at danger and danger was pulling me close.
"Oh, don't be like that My wolf. Go on, take a sip. I promise it will be worth your time."
Her words felt like an order I could not refuse so I did, despite the better parts of me, I took a sip. It was sweet–dangerously so, I have never tasted anything like it before...and I wanted more. What was only supposed to be a sip, became a swig, and before I knew it I felt my senses tingle. My body felt light and finally there I was again...sweet nonexistence...
I can't say I remember much of that night. I can't even for the life of me explain how I got home. But when I awoke there I was, on my bed, wearing the clothes I wore from the night before. I would've thought it was all a dream but the throbbing of my whole body and my migraine proved me wrong.
The thought of the Lady still lingered in my mind. It was such a bizarre encounter that I wondered if it was actually real. I mean how many beautiful ladies hang out in the park at night? And what was that drink she offered me. And I hated to admit it but in the back of my mind, I wondered where I could get some more.
With ginger steps I went down for breakfast. There on the table was breakfast prepared for me with my mother taking small servings and slowly putting it in her mouth while she listened to her songs played on the stereo. She used to be a ballet dancer before she met my father, and perhaps these classical songs she played every day were the last remainders of the life she used to live, and I suspect, longed to live again.
"Good morning, Mother."
She gently put her fork down and smiled at me. "Well good morning Claus. You went home quite late last night."
From the way she looked, I could tell that it wasn't just me going home late that bothered her. "Well you see–"
"Oh don't worry Dear. You're a young man after all, I completely understand."
No, you don't. I thought about telling her exactly what happened. Not even the truth but the lie I fabricated for Mr. Rodriguez. "Hey mom I got a girl drunk last night and her grandpa caught me and beat me up. Do you still understand? Am I still your perfect little boy?" A part of me wanted to say it but instead I said.
"Thank you, Mother."
She still looked unbothered, tranquil. Perhaps even if I did tell her, that distant, porcelain like smile she wore like make upwould still not disappear, after all she's living in this perfect fairytale world, isn't she? I took my plate and decided to eat upstairs. My migraine leaving me in a sour mood.
I booted my laptop and looked at my messages. There was a school announcement, brochures from possible colleges, a meme sent by Raf, and my fingers froze when I saw the last one.
Sent 2:00 am
"My Lone Wolf,
I was fascinated to meet you Claus. If you were too, then this time around, you come find me. I do not like repetitive cycles so don't look for me where I had already been before. Seek me under twilight and I shall give you another taste of the nectar of the gods. P.S. Don't forget, this is our little secret.
xoxo, Lady Carmilla"
I immediately deleted the message and blocked the number. I didn't even know what got into me. That perfume put me in a trance! Anyway, let this be the end of it. I don't go looking for trouble, trouble finds me on its own.
Still though, Lady Carmilla eh? There was something about her that I have never seen on anyone else before. Maturity but playfulness. Kindness but also cruelty. The perfect paradox. If I'm not careful, I might just become intoxicated with just her person.
I then received another message from Raf. "Dude, heard from Lara. What the hell were you thinking?"
I just closed my laptop and set it to my table. Suddenly my phone rang.
"Don't you dare ignore me you slimy son of a bulldog!"
"Well...to what do I owe the pleasure, cattlespawn?
"Don't play dumb with me, you reject her and then get her grandfather to hate you with a fabricated story?!"
"Hey! I did that for her sake, do you think I liked being beat up?"
"Honestly Claus, I would think so. Because why the hell would you choose the worst possible way to bring Lara home? What did you possibly gain by that stunt you pulled other than a black-eye and the wrath of an old man?"
"I brought Lara peace! And it was one dearly paid so get off my case!"
"She never asked you for that did she? Aren't you just projecting your own–"" Before he could finish, I ended the call and laid down on my bed. I was tired and I had a throbbing migraine. So, what if he didn't understand. What did he know. What I know is that Lara was safe.
My phone buzzed again. "Convenient how this whole stunt you pulled for Lara also stopped her having any contact with you. You can't keep pretending your problems don't exist just because they're not in front of you Claus. This is not dinner with your parents."
I took my phone and replied. "Get off my case Rafael! I did what I did for both of us. She is happy in her world, she might not know exactly where it is she fits yet but it is certainly not with me. I may have burned the bridge, but I made sure the darkness never reaches her."
"So that's your plan? Pull the pin off the grenade and call it a noble sacrifice?"
This time around I shut my phone off. I didn't want this. My brain was in a buzz so to distract myself I decided to write a new story.
"There was once a prince who was betrothed to a princess of a different land. This princess was known to be the fairest in the land and all the other princes wanted her to be theirs. This prince however was unmoved by this princess' beauty. One day he decided to run away from the palace to escape his fate when he happened to come across a witch's hut. He came inside and there he saw the witch, beautiful but dangerous. She offered him a potion to make all his worries disappear and when he took it. The world became resplendent in his eyes. For once in his lifetime he became able to see the hues of the different fauna and he could feel the magic in the air. All of this came at a cost however. The witch refused to give him another taste of the potion unless he gave her the palace in exchange. And the foolish prince offered his palace...but never came back. The End."
As I finished the story I stared blankly at it, embarrassed by this hot garbage I have just written. "...damn...transference much?" I said to myself as I facepalmed and deleted the file. I shut the laptop off and decided to head to school early.