Behind the door was a small room with a curtain on the side. It consisted of a table and two bowls of stickers on it. Confused, I approached the table wondering what the stickers were for. As I got closer, I realized that there were pieces of paper on the table filled with korean words but I could read them. I guess the original owner's body also comes with a free korean translator that could also translate writing.
The paper read, "Rate yourself! Put anywhere from 1 to 5 stickers on your contestant t-shirt, next to your name tag. 1 means 'poor skills' while 5 means 'I definitely have the skills to debut' so rate yourself carefully!"
I had never seen this guy perform so how could I rate his skills??? Well the stickers were shiny and having more did show that you were more confident... so I wanted to grab them all. But, I didn't want to unnecessarily make any of the judges anticipate my performance and have them be disappointed.
After a while, I put 4 of them on. 3 seemed like the better option but like I was out of control my hands automatically grabbed one more. Maybe I a sticker-holic in my past life. It's okay though, one more just showed that I was confident.
Then I slightly pulled the curtain, certain that on the other side were probably the judges. Stepping through, I was shocked. Not only were there judges but there were also the contestants that had gone before me. The judges sat at the very front and the contestants sat scattered among chairs draped with different colored cloths on different elevation levels. There were 4 judges in total, two male and two female. They didn't have any name tags like the contestants, or name cards on the judges table so I didn't know their names. I could only hope that I wasn't required to say them.
Walking closer to the edge of the stage, I found numbers on the chairs indicating that the different levels and chair colors were actually representing the rankings of the contestants. There were 5 levels, from top to bottom, turquoise, lilac, light pink, yellow, and red. The higher your ranking, the higher the level with your chair was. Honestly that did seem a bit unfair though. After giving an outstanding performance to rank high, you have to expend even more energy than trainees that did worse than you to make it to your seat.
Well I was here anyway and would probably only rank among the middle so what did I care?
"Hello there, could you introduce yourself?" A female judge with short black hair asked. All the judges were smiling while looking at me intently. Did the four stars get their hopes up too high? I knew I shouldn't have taken an extra star!
"Hello, my name is Ahn Hwan-Byeol," I said while bowing.
The judges started looking at a paper in front of them, likely filled with my information.
"I see you are auditioning with the song Los*r=Lov*r?" the black-haired male judge asks, "Did you have to make many changes to the choreography perform this alone?"
It was time to see how strong my BS skills were. I replied, "I tried my best to keep the choreography like the original, but, yes there are some changes since there's only one of me."
"Well we look forward to your performance!" exclaimed the male judge with red hair.
Suddenly the lights got a little dimmer and someone dressed the same as the crew I saw in the back signaled me to go to the center of the stage. This was it the big moment where I either mess up big time or do okayishly well.
"3...2...1...Go!" a female AI voice signaled the start of my performance as I sat in the middle of the stage hoping that I chose the right starting position. As the music started, my body started moving along with it.
Tilting my head, tousling my hair, and looking at the audience with a focused gaze. Then executing a perfect kick while simultaneously getting up. Wow I was so awesome! Honestly, I couldn't see how I looked while dancing, but I felt so cool being able to execute all these actions. However, I clearly was not in charge of the body right now. It was a weird sensation, just a random thought being shoved in my mind like "kick" then suddenly doing it. The thought wasn't mine but I was the one who had to execute it. Of course I could have chosen not to execute it but then the body would stop dancing and I would have gotten a bad score.
When I had to start singing it was weird. The dance commands were still going through my mind but it didn't interfere with my singing. I felt like I was the one singing and the dancing was handed to someone else. Like the body was a machine operated by two people and I was the one in charge of the vocals. Out of desperation, I had memorized the lyrics but I hadn't sang them before. My voice sounded different from how the original singers sounded but my voice truly felt like mine.
Throughout the performance, the adrenaline rushed through me, drowning me in excitement and the feeling was addicting. On stage I was singing a song about wanting to be someone's lover and salvation even if it meant being a loser in the eyes of the rest of the world. It held a deep meaning, and yet on the inside I was just enjoying the thrill of being able to dance cooly and sing out loud.
Before I knew it, the song was already over and people were cheering and clapping. I was out of breath, sweat rolling down my forehead and dripping onto the stage floor. But I felt great, this rewarding and addicting sensation was one I had never felt before. As if I was swimming in a sea of ecstasy and all I wanted was more.
Because of that performance I could understand the desperate desire to debut. The desire of the original owner, as well as the other 95 contestants. At that moment, I too wanted to debut and keep performing.